Records of the Year

It’s finally done, after much deliberation and whatnot, I’ve compiled a list of my favourite records from this year, and written a poorly crafted blurb for each of them. My words don’t do them justice, so check them all out for yourself and hopefully I’ll be able to expose you to something new and interesting!

10. Wolves in the Throne Room – Black Cascade

Wolves in the Throne Room’s style of black metal reminds me of the early 90’s releases by Burzum and Darkthrone. Long songs with repetitive, simple riffs and vocals that scream in agony over the din. With Black Cascade, there is definitely an attempt to add more the “atmospheric” side of the band, with it’s 10+ minute songs and inclusion of synth backing tracks on top of the chaotic noise. They also seem to pull of a strange feat of emulating the early raw black metal production while maintaining a listenable quality. This is often the sticking point for most people with black metal, and possibly those who can’t deal with some of the overly harsh stuff might find this more accessible. Of course, I could just be getting used to all this noise.

9. Baroness – Blue Record

Earlier this year in a review I mentioned that this record wasn’t that phenomenal, nothing that inspiring. Boy was I wrong. I don’t know what the hell I was listening to when I wrote that review, but my brain must have been shut off to not recognize the sheer brilliance displayed in this record. Sure they feature that low range muddy guitar that’s become a staple of stoner or sludge metal bands, but Baroness have created something much more than a staple record here. What it is is an amalgam of great metal, intricate solos clash with sludgy rhythms, clean sections mix in with the cacphonic. Everything flows together making a great record, and one I wish I had the good sense to recognize the first time around.

8. Cobalt – Gin

If Wolves in the Throne room is a more atmospheric approach to black metal, then Cobalt approach it from the complete opposite side. There is not much atmosphere here, because there’s no room for it. Every track is stuffed to the brim with overwhelmingly intense sound. Listening through this record for the first time is an experience, it straight out kicks your ass and you appreciate it. There’s kind of a Tool style vibe present in some parts of the record, the end of Dry Body for example. The long spells of hypnotizing drums and accompanying guitars creating a repetition that sucks you in. What we’re left with in the end is a harsh slab of black metal, and an unforgiving one at that.

7. The Tragically Hip – We Are the Same

With their last studio release World Container, the Kingston band seemed to be headed in a more rock direction, with plenty of loud songs and producer Bob Rock layering guitars, drums, and whatever else he had handy to give the record a lot of body. It’s interesting then, how We Are The Same charts off in a different course. The overall sound is more “organic” here, plenty of acoustic guitar, piano, and more emphasis on the Hip’s country tinged side than the rock and roll one. Not to say there aren’t moments of rock brilliance as well, as Love Is A First features everything that embodies a good Hip rock song, Gord Downie ranting included. Speaking of Downie, the vocalist once again provides his excellent and unique voice to great effect, along with his great lyrical ability. It’s encouraging to see a band that has been together so long can still produce music so effeciently and focused like this, and is still changing their sound instead of falling back on their past success.

6. Between the Buried and Me – The Great Misdirect

It seems that with every album I like this band more and more. After the great Colors, the group has hit an even higher point on my favourites chart with The Great Misdirect. Maybe it’s because they continue to push the envelope to how far they can go in terms of their compositions. The range of music on this album is huge, from the refined jangly reverb guitars on the opener “Mirrors” to the eventual complex and bizarre depths the album will reach later on. There’s something for everybody here, great synth work, some stonery rock sections, even a weird ass section of groovy blues rock with horse sound effects. If you’re a fan of “progressive” music in the truest sense of the word, you have no excuse not to give this album a listen.

5. Devin Townsend Project – Addicted

While Ki was a sort of mellowing out record, Addicted is a lot closer to Townsend’s past solo releases. Amazing walls of sound, coupled with layers and layers of vocals and guitarwork that are all polished off with his excellent production skills. One song, Hyperdrive! was previously heard on one of my personal favourites Ziltoid The Omniscient, however it has been rerecorded here with female vocals. The addition of Anneke van Giersbergen’s vocals in this album are actually a great compliment to Devin’s arrangements, and provide a nice alternative to the usual vocal domination we get from most Townsend releases. Devin has been quoted as saying  he’d “get offended by my own pretension and rock some good vibes with Addicted” and that is pretty much a summary of the attitude portrayed in this record. You can’t help get excited when every song ends with an exclamation point!

4. Matthew Good – Vancouver

In the middle of all my extreme music, there’s still room for well orchestrated alternative rock. Matthew Good’s newest is much more grand than the great-in-it’s-own-way Hospital Music, and we get instead incredibly expansive songs full of pianos and strings that seem to drift out into space. There’s a strange sort of simplicity in Good’s songs and yet at the same time one could hardly call a lot of these arrangements less than complex. The vocals are strong as always, and Good’s knack for writing both poignant and affecting lyrics is always on display. Overall the album feels much more upbeat than its predecessor, but it still hits some depressing points. It’s another quality addition to Good’s output, and songs like “A Silent Army In the Trees”, “Fought To Fight It” and “The Vancouver National Anthem” have all of the venom we’ve seen before, along with the more laid back atmospheres of the rest of the album.

3. The Mars Volta – Octahedron

It seems like every time a new Mars Volta album comes out, all reviews generally focus on the same thing. “It’s not Deloused”, “Nowhere near Deloused”. I swear to God I have never seen a review not mention/compare to the groups debut (this one now included) and it’s a damn shame. Guess what? This year the Mars Volta put out an album, and you know what, it’s good. It’s actually damn good. Octahedron is probably the most focused, controlled form of the band we’ve seen, and everything here works brilliantly. Some might complain about the slow start, but I feel the entire album works so well on a large scale. Every part necessary, building up and down as it just drags you along the soundscapes that have defined Omar and Cedric’s band for years now. The two songs Cotopaxi and Desperate graves in particular form a breathtaking chunk of the album, capturing the off the wall dynamics and excitement that embody the band.

2. Converge – Axe to Fall

This is how an album is supposed to start. Right out the gate Converge give us the awesome adrenaline inducing “Dark Horse” and they rarely let up afterwards. Up until fairly recently I hadn’t been much of a fan of the band, but after relistening to both this release and the seminal Jane Doe, I realized how great they really are This is probably one of the most “metal” influenced of Converge’s albums, but the hardcore elements are still present. The record is full of guest appearances from members of bands like Genghis Tron, The Red Chord, Neurosis, and many others. Occasionally the band stops to let you breathe, the last two tracks in particular having plenty of slow parts, but on the whole you’re getting an unrelenting album of metal tinged hardcore that has become their calling card.

1. Propagandhi – Supporting Caste

I can’t count how many times I’ve listened to this record this year. Aside from the ridiculous Mercyful Fate cover at the end, I love every song, and the overall album is probably the most satisfying I’ve listened to all year. Employing a thrash/punk crossover style extremely well, Propagandhi show that they can write both kick ass music and intriguing lyrics. I’m not an animal rights activist, but I still felt pity after “Potemkin City Limits”. Many Canadians might be interested in “Dear Coaches Corner” as it reams out Don Cherry while simultaneously questioning the true reasons behind our pre-game ceremonies. “Without Love” is an almost heartbreaking account of loss, something you wouldn’t think to find in an aggressive crossover record. There’s many different moods here, from the super serious political stuff to the tongue in cheek “Banger’s Embrace” about trips to see punk shows. Propagandhi have come a long way since the 90’s where they served as a Canadian NOFX soundalike. Now they have their own identity, and it’s damn solid one.

2009 Records of the Year: Honourable Mentions

The top ten are coming soon, but first I wanted to post some other records that didn’t make the cut for whatever reason. These are in alphabetical order, so don’t look into the listing too much, haha.

Algernon Cadwallader – Hot Green

One of the reasons this is just an honourable mention is because it’s only three songs, just an EP. Clocking in at just eight minutes in length, Hot Green captures Algernon’s sound perfectly, clearly born out of inspiration by the Kinsella clan. If you’re a fan of Cap’n Jazz, and that noodly indie/emo-punk sound, this is definitely something you’d enjoy. Hopefully another full length is on its way.

Note: The title of this thing is confusing me, as sometimes it’s referred to as “Fun”, others as “Hot Green”, so take that for what it’s worth.

Alice in Chains – Black Gives Way to Blue

This was one of the most pleasant surprises of the year for me. After not releasing a new studio album since the death of lead singer Layne Staley, I was a bit worried at how this one would turn out. I think Jerry Cantrell really proves that he is the heart of this band, as this record is full of great songs, including some moments that recall earlier era tracks. The new singer fits in perfectly, and the trademark harmonies are in full force. We’ve waited 14 years for a new studio album, but unlike Axl Rose, Alice in Chains delivers.

Azarath – Praise the Beast

What is it about Poland that lends itself to great brutal death metal? From the land of Behemoth come Azarath, another band who play an extreme satanic (cries of “Hail Lucifer!” included), brutal brand of death metal. This thing is heavy, with punishing drums and scizophrenic guitars that jump from pounding riffs to high pitched squeals. The only downside to this style is that it can get kind of hard to endure after awhile, but aside from that, it’s a quality death metal release that some people might have missed, so I feel the need to mention it.

Devin Townsend Project – Ki

I’ll start out by saying I really enjoyed this album. In fact, I might have put it in the top 10, but I feel it’s unfair putting two albums by the same guy in the top (foreshadowing!). That being said, Devin Townsend is two things, a musical genius and a very generous man. He’s currently in the process of releasing a string of four albums, the first two of which came out this year, the third on it’s way. Ki is a unique turn for the man so associated with loud, angry music like his Strapping Young Lad output. This instead is almost a controlled rage, with some nice mellow pieces interlaced with occasional outbursts that show the other side is still there.

Immortal – All Shall Fall

Ridiculous music videos aside, Immortal are probably one of the most consistent black metal acts still going today. Consistency is what All Shall Fall is all about, continuing in the vein of the previous record Sons of Northern Darkness. This album further explores the more thrashy side, and this time throws in lots of frenetic solos. One can only assume Abbath is channeling Venom here. The only reason I keep this as an honourable mention is due to the fact that it lacks the great memorable riffs that I found on Sons.

Mastodon – Crack the Skye

Mastodon have always exhibited some prog elements to their style of metal, but with Crack the Skye it takes precedence over anything else. There’s complex, winding songs with mostly clean vocals, a far cry from some of the agressive tones of previous albums. I can’t say I was a massive fan initially, but after relistening to it I am definitely enjoying it much more.

mc chris – Part Six

With the release of three EPs this year and a compilation of remixes, mc chris is anything but lazy. What I’ve dubbed Part Six includes three “parts”, short EPs with seven songs each. Each one contains some quality songs, including the joyfully vulgar Part One with “Awesome Fucker” and “006″. I still think “Japanese Maid” from Part Two would be a huge hit in dance clubs, and all three albums are tied together with the skits we’ve come to expect on an mc release. All of this seems to be leading to a full length release in 2010, and if these parts are any indication we should be in for a treat.

Snowing – Fuck Your Emotional Bullshit

Formed from members the now dead Street Smart Cyclist (also an awesome band) Snowing employ the noodly guitar work like Algernon Cadwallader, but have a more focused punk edge. The vocals are rough and ragged, and the subject matter a bit more depressing compared to the fairly upbeat Street Smart songs that preceded this. Still, this EP is a great dose of energetic, raw emo influenced punk, and I look forward to a full length release.

Well there you go. My final top ten list, complete with numbers and everything will be posted eventually, as I feel eventually is the best time to do everything.

- D

Not a Fan #3: Christmas Music

Before I begin, I just want to say, I like Christmas. I’m not one of those “I hate Christmas” type of person, all concerned with the commercialism. Screw Charlie Brown, presents are awesome. I just feel like putting that into context, so I don’t sound like I’m just your average humbugger.

That being said, I hate Christmas music. I can probably count on one hand the amount of Christmas music I enjoy. The soundtrack for the Peanuts Christmas special, Weird Al’s “The Night Santa Went Crazy”, and maybe Tchaikovsky’s Nutcracker (I’m going to assume most people consider it Christmassy music). After that, I really can’t think of anything else. I can’t stand listening to it, and dread the day of the Santa Claus parade every year, as it seems like that afternoon is the signal for it to be “okay” to play it on the radio.

So, why do I hate it? First, there’s nothing less inspiring than Christmas songs. Every recording feels incredibly shallow, because for the most part, it’s a song that has been recorded dozens of times already. How many times do we have to hear “Jingle Bells”? It’s not like we’re waiting for some new revolutionary recording of one of these holiday staples to blow us way. We expect the same songs repeated ad nauseam, and they are always mediocre. Despite my earlier comments on commercialism, there’s nothing more “manufactured” sounding than Christmas tunes.

On the radio station at home, they used to have a setup for Christmas day in terms of the playlist. Every hour had a “theme”, Elvis songs, rock songs, crooner songs, country songs etc. For an entire 24 hour cycle they were able to have a different theme for each hour and fill it with Christmas music. The fact that this was possible means there is too much of this stuff. And every year we get another half a dozen new Christmas compilations to add to the neverending pile of pointless, uninspired music.

Some people make “original” songs for the holidays, which in a lot of cases are just as lame, but in a new unique way. You ever hear the song “Thistle Hair the Christmas Bear” by Alabama? Jesus that shit is awful. It’s like if the guys that wrote Barney songs were rednecks, got drunk, and decided they should write a song for kids. I’m not sure how original that “Santa Baby” song is, but it creeps the hell out of me. And nothing is as cheery (and fucked up) as John Denver’s “Please, Daddy (Don’t Get Drunk on Christmas)”.

Also, too many people use bells to make these songs sound Christmassy. Bells suck.

Fortunately much like egg nog, people seem to think Christmas music is only good around the holiday times. Also much like egg nog, everyone seems to realize how shitty the stuff is once Christmas is over, and we get at least 10 months of non-holiday tunes.

- D

The Hooray for Reading! Book Review – New Moon

There were a million ways I had thought of to start this. Even now, I wonder if I’m writing this in the funniest, or at least, most understandable format. I have been planning this blog for weeks, and yet haven’t written a single word. Until now. There really isn’t a better time for this, considering the movie release, and that’s always a good time to jump on a gravy train. But I’m not here to talk about a movie, oh no, I’m here to talk about something much more sinister.

I have a copy of New Moon. The book. Beside me right now. I have had this book since August, when I grabbed it from a lost and found at my work. I had to read it. I had to know what the hell the fuss was about. I had to share it with my roommates. I had no idea what I was getting into.

The first thing I noticed after reading a few brief passages was that my brain actually began to eat itself. I thought I had suffered a mild aneurysm, because I couldn’t comprehend an appropriate thought to describe what I was feeling. As someone who never shuts the hell up, I was shocked to be rendered speechless. I finally said the only complete thought that came to mind.

“This isn’t real”

Alright, obviously it isn’t real, it’s fiction. That isn’t what I was thinking. I mean the whole book, the fact that it was published. That someone actually wrote it, found someone willing to put it on shelves, and for people to pick it up and read it. I was questioning reality. As I delved deeper and deeper, I began to feel more and more like someone had arranged some massive practical joke that was determined to destroy my sanity.

Now I am not a reader of “great” literature by any means. I am also not an accomplished writer. I am also quite positive that New Moon was written by a 13-year-old girl, or at least, someone who thinks a novel should be a paperback equivalent of creepy fan fiction normally reserved for the darkest corners of the internet. I have a copy of a Goosebumps book that I took from a box on the street last year, and I swear to God it has a better plot, character development, and overall appeal than this book. I’m jumping ahead slightly, we’ll get to characters in a minute. Let’s take the plot route.

Listen, if you’re going to do the whole “vampires and werewolves are like Romeo and Juliet thing”, don’t fucking quote Romeo and Juliet incessantly in the book. The point of allusion isn’t to bash the readers head in with it. I swear the author just sat there and thought “LOL, this is just like Shakespeare, I should put a quote from it at the beginning. And then make the characters watch the movie. I sure hope my readers get the comparison here!”. Plus didn’t the Underworld movies just do this in like, the last few years?

Okay screw it, I want to talk about the characters. Besides having about as much depth as a wading pool, the narrator Bella is essentially a perfect example of everything young girls should avoid being. I seriously couldn’t believe that the book was written by a woman, when the main character seemed so powerless and pathetic. Basically, through reading this book, you learn a few things about being a young girl. You should moon after incredibly dangerous, controlling (but at least good-looking!) men. You should also thank God every single day, that that man has chosen you, because you are not worthy of affection from an attractive man, being the pathetic girl that you are. Go ahead, don’t assume you have some sort of redeeming quality he sees in you, he’s just pitying you and thank your damn lucky stars he hasn’t realized how awful you are.

Great self-esteem boost, huh? You’d think I’m reading into this, but when a girl is constantly saying things to the tune of “He looked like a god. I looked very average, even for a human, almost shamefully plain. I flipped the picture over with a feeling of disgust.” I think it shows a little bit of an image issue. That and the fact she worships the ground he walks on, is sending a great message to all the preteen girls out there reading this book.

It’s a softcore creepy vampire fantasy really. The character Edward is so disgustingly perfect in every way. Of course he’s smart, handsome, dangerous, lightning quick. Did I mention he sparkles? I guess that one’s played out by now. He writes music too. What a catch, keep your eyes out for that one girls. Oh, and there’s another guy now, Jacob. He’s like, a werewolf or something. Though, when our fearless protagonist meets a bunch of them, they’re “just four really big half-naked boys”. How sexy.

It’s getting late, so I think I’ll just finish with a bunch of quotes from random pages and make smart ass comments.

“what with his chest being hard and cold—-and perfect…”

Hard and cold wouldn’t my idea of perfect man, unless I was a necrophiliac I guess.

“how was I supposed to explain the fact that the brilliant sunbeams were shattering off his skin into a thousand rainbow shards like he was made of crystal or diamond?”

Body glitter will do that.

“Even after half a year with him, I still couldn’t believe that I deserved this degree of good fortune”

Oh come on, you’re probably a nice girl, luck had nothing to do with it!

“He, for some unfathomable reason, wanted to be with me”

Or maybe not. See a counselor.

“It was almost uncanny that anyone could look so…so…beyond description“

I love…love…when people overuse ellipses.

“Besides, the only kind of heaven I could appreciate would have to include Edward”

I’ve got some bad news, I don’t think the bible says anything about vampires in heaven.

“Love, life, meaning…over.”

My God, how can she live on without her precious Edward?

“Jacob was a gift from the gods”

Oh I see. That was quick.

Well, I guess that’s enough of my being an asshole. I fully understand that there are millions of people who have bought this book, and expect a hearty amount of hate mail, comments, etc. If someone can come up with a valid and well written counter argument, by all means, send it to me. Of course, this is all my opinion, so don’t get too uptight about it. After all, I’m just one smart ass, and there are millions of Twilight fans. Millions of people can’t be wrong, right?

Man that blog took forever. Now I’ll relax and listen to some Muse, that will get my mind of of that terrible book. Wait a second…

*opens New Moon and reads*

“There are emotions, scenes, and plot threads in this novel that were born from Muse songs and would not exist without their genius”

God damn you Stephenie Meyer, God damn you.

Weekly Reviews #3: Metal Madness

This week I look at three metal releases that have come out in the last week or two. Now with pictures!

Immortal – All Shall Fall

The new Immortal album was everything I could have hoped for. After being a huge fan of the last release, Sons of Northern Darkness, I was really looking forward to this album, and I can say it is not disappointing. It continues the more thrash oriented sound from the last album, but feels slightly “dirtier” in parts, more of a black metal aesthetic. That’s not to say the production is bad, because it’s great. Think of it as Sons with a bit more speed and soloing, and there you go. Definitely recommended for fans of the band, as well as anyone who hasn’t given them a shot yet. Now I just have to pray they tour North America.

Baroness – Blue Record

The real reason I’m even reviewing this is because of how much the latest issue of Decibel magazine fellated this album. Not only was it the cover story, they proclaimed that it might be the album of the year, and we’ve still got about two and half months left to go. Simply put, this album is good, but not the second coming of Jesus like it’s portrayed. It doesn’t do anything that bands like Torche or Goes Cube didn’t do this year or the year before. It’s your typical sludgy/stoner rock with some various prog and post metal bits thrown in. Like I said, good, but not the best of the year, I prefer the new Goes Cube to this.

Children of Bodom – Skeletons in the Closet

Last, we have this new release from Finnish metallers Children of Bodom, which consists entirely of covers. I can honestly say I enjoy this album more than most of their original catalogue. I don’t mind a few of their songs, but the albums have been getting increasingly boring the last few years, and this record is a hilarious detour from that road. A quick glance through the names covered on this album make a bit of sense coming from a metal band. Slayer, Iron Maiden, Suicidal Tendencies, Anthrax, the Scorpions. Then we hit names like CCR, Pat Benetar, and even Kenny Rogers for God’s sake! Oh and yes, this also features the infamous Britney Spears cover as well.  Really, it entertains me quite a bit, and if you’re in the mood for a little “Looking Out My Back Door” metal style, then this is the disc for you.

That’s it for this week. Check back later for other entries, and of course more reviews as I consume media so you don’t have to. Hopefully I’ll be able to get Matthew Good’s Vancouver done by then.

- D

And Your Number One Song This Week Is…

I used to have a top ten chart I listened to every week.

In my head.

When I was a kid, I used to have a “chart” in my head of my favourite songs, just like the one I listened to every weekend on the radio. I would lie in bed at night and go through it in my head, like I was counting down the hits just like Casey Kasem. I can even still remember some of the songs that reigned over my countdown, like Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing” which was always at number one. I’m not entirely sure why, but maybe much like the real charts, it would be the band’s only foray into the number one spot in the top songs of the day (including mine). It also represented a pattern in my chart which was for some reason very ballad focused. Lonestar’s “Amazed” was up there, and one hit wonder Shawn Mullins’ “Lullabye”. I guess I was kind of a wussy kid.

It wasn’t all heartfelt ballads though. Bands like New Radicals and Fastball had some big chart time as well, along with that fun time when Chumbawumba was cool. I think I had a thing for one hit wonders, or maybe there was just a high ratio of them those days in the late 90’s. Shit went crazy when Smashmouth came out with “All Star” too, and that rocketed up the charts, though never knocking off the ever present Aerosmith from the top spot.

Now you may ask, why the hell am I rambling about this? Well, besides just sharing a weird habit I had as a kid, it’s also kind of an exploration of something that I think I could never have again. Point is, there is a time when I could name my top ten favourite songs. I even had a “favourite” song, which was pretty much set in stone as far as I was concerned. Now, I can’t even name my top ten favourite 80’s hardcore songs. Despite the fact that nowadays I am virtually a musical encyclopedia on most music, I can’t even name my favourite songs any more. I became so over saturated with the stuff that I could never even begin to pick out my “favourite song ever”.

I find this kind of depressing. Yes I still enjoy music, and I might have some favourite songs or albums if you can break down your list into sub-sub-genres. I think though, that I will never have that initial certainty again, over what I know is my favourite thing in the world.

Like I said, there isn’t really a point to this, other than to ruminate on something I no longer can connect with, but I thought it would make for an interesting discussion. Can you name, with absolute certainty, your top ten favourite songs? Did you ever have a weekly countdown of your favourite songs? Did you know I used to think Eric Clapton was black? Plenty of hard pressing questions here, and if you’re nice enough, please respond with a comment.

- D

I used to have a top ten chart I listened to every week.

In my head.

When I was a kid, I used to have a “chart” in my head of my favourite songs, just like the one I listened to every weekend on the radio. I would lie in bed at night and go through it in my head, like I was counting down the hits just like Casey Kasem. I can even still remember some of the songs that reigned over my countdown, like Aerosmith’s “I Don’t Wanna Miss a Thing” which was always at number one. I’m not entirely sure why, but maybe much like the real charts, it would be the band’s only foray into the number one spot in the top songs of the day (including mine). It also represented a pattern in my chart which was for some reason very ballad focused. Lonestar’s “Amazed” was up there, and one hit wonder Shawn Mullins’ “Lullaby”. I guess I was kind of a wussy kid.

This album was my life.

It wasn’t all heartfelt ballads though. Bands like New Radicals and Fastball had some big chart time as well, along with that fun time when Chumbawumba was cool. I think I had a thing for one hit wonders, or maybe there was just a high ratio of them those days in the late 90’s. Shit went crazy when Smashmouth came out with “All Star” too, and that rocketed up the charts, though never knocking off the ever present Aerosmith from the top spot.

This was beyond cool.

Now you may ask, why the hell am I rambling about this? Well, besides just sharing a weird habit I had as a kid, it’s also kind of an exploration of something that I think I could never have again. Point is, there is a time when I could name my top ten favourite songs. I even had a “favourite” song, which was pretty much set in stone as far as I was concerned. Now, I can’t even name my top ten favourite 80’s hardcore songs. Despite the fact that nowadays I am virtually a musical encyclopedia on most music, I can’t even name my favourite songs any more. I became so over saturated with the stuff that I could never even begin to pick out my “favourite song ever”.

I find this kind of depressing. Yes I still enjoy music, and I might have some favourite songs or albums if you can break down your list into sub-sub-genres. I think though, that I will never have that initial certainty again, over what I know is my favourite thing in the world.

Like I said, there isn’t really a point to this, other than to ruminate on something I no longer can connect with, but I thought it would make for an interesting discussion. Can you name, with absolute certainty, your top ten favourite songs? Did you ever have a weekly countdown of your favourite songs? Did you know I used to think Eric Clapton was black? Plenty of hard pressing questions here, and if you’re nice enough, please respond with a comment.

- D

Weekly Reviews #2: 1 Out 3 Ain’t Bad….

So this week I’m going to give my thoughts on 3 brand new (pun intended) albums that I’ve gotten my hands on. Just a note, these “reviews” are for the tl,dr crowd who just want a quick blurb so they can pretend they’ve heard/seen it and move on with their lives. Enjoy.

Alice In Chains – Black Gives Way to Blue

This is the first AiC album in a long time, and I have to say I was pleasantly surprised. Jerry Cantrell shows that he really is the heart and soul of the band here, and even without singer Layne Staley, they still make some great music with that signature sound we’ve come to expect from the band.  Definitely check this out if you’re a fan of the band. Even the single is good!

Pearl Jam – Backspacer

Backspacer? I barely even know her! Alright, shitty jokes aside…wait, that’s a perfect segue. This album is essentially a shitty joke. Something you want to enjoy, but it’s employed so poorly that all you can manage is to remember better jokes you’ve heard in an attempt to laugh again. I was doing that with this album, thinking back to when Pearl Jam wasn’t the heaping pile of generi-rock this record is. I swear to God I heard some autotune on one of the ballads. T-Pain/Pearl Jam crossover? Only time will tell. I recommend you avoid, and go listen to Ten instead.

Brand New – Daisy

Every Brand New album seems to have its own “sound” so to speak. You can listen to them all, and they sound fairly distinct from each other. They continue this trend with the new album as well. Unfortunately, the distinct sound on this record is crap. When it first started playing, I thought I had gotten some terrible screamo band by mistake. Plus they have a bunch of “ambient” filler bits, which isn’t good when the album itself is fairly short. I think a friend of mine summed it up nicely when he said “It’s kind of like all the bad parts from the other Brand New albums put onto one CD”. It doesn’t get more accurate than that. Extremely disappointed, and if you’re a fan of the band (and not one of the crazy they-can-do-no-wrong fans) chances are you won’t be too impressed either.

Weekly Reviews

This is something I thought I’d try out. I’m going to just do a weekly post (along with other blogs whenever those get made) basically talking about music/movies/whatever I’ve experienced that week, along with my thoughts. I can’t promise they’ll all be brand new things, but I’ll try to keep up on the times…

Megadeth – Endgame

I checked out the new Megadeth album and I have to say it definitely  does not disappoint if you are looking for some excellent thrash Mustaine style. New addition Chris Broderick fits very well into the band, and really holds his own. Some of the lyrics are a little goofy, but hey, it’s Megadeth not Shakespeare. I usually don’t fret too much about thrash lyrics unless they’re abysmally awful, as long as the music is great then I’m set. I’m particularily fond of the instrumental opener, the title track, and the song “Head Crusher”.

3 Inches of Blood – Here Lies Thy Doom

After screamer Jamie Hooper was forced to leave the band due to voice problems, vocalist Cam Pipes was forced to take sole vocal duties for the band, and I can’t be more pleased. This album presents another gradual evolution in the band’s sound, further cementing it as a somewhat convincing tribute of heavy metal days gone by. It’s all a little bit goofy, with song names like “Rock in Hell” and “Snake Fighter” but that’s what I’ve come to expect from these guys. Pretty decent effort better than Fire Up the Blades, but not on par with Advance and Vanquish.

Muse – The Resistance

This one hurt. I was really looking forward to this album, and I was pretty let down. A lot of the songs here don’t really tread much new territory, and feel kind of repetitive and dull. Speaking of dull, the promised “symphony” suite that ends the album is more yawn inducing than awe inspiring. I will stick with the other material, as nothing here really jumped out and got me as excited as previous albums.

Devin Townsend Project – Ki

This has been out awhile now, but I still wanted to mention it, since I listened to it again yesterday. Many people know Dev from his awesome band Strapping Young Lad, but after he disbanded that group, he decided to focus on a new musical direction with his solo work. The first in a string of four albums is Ki, which has elements you’ve come to expect, along with a whole new side of Hevy Devy that is actually quite beautiful. Some of the tracks are incredibly mellow and soothing, and even his interpretation of “Cum on Feel the Noize” actually takes what usually comes off as a cheesy song and makes it sound almost inspiring. It’s truly a great variety of songs and produced extremely well, as Devin often does with his music. Highly recommended, and I look forward to the upcoming albums.

Well, that’s it for now, check in next week to find out what the hell I consumed. I’ll probably listen to the new Brand New album, and hopefully some other newer albums.

Are You an Album or a Single Man?

As far back as I can remember, I’ve always listened to albums. Not just a few songs on a CD, but the whole thing, start to finish. I find that even now, I do much the same, always listening to entire LPs, and not just picking and choosing a few songs and skipping the rest. I think this might go back to my dad, who would play Pink Floyd’s The Wall in the kitchen while preparing supper. Growing up on concept albums could really endear someone to the format.

I’ve never been a “single” guy, buying a CD for one or two songs that are on the radio. Even when I had an album by a quite popular band, I seemed to enjoy the more obscure songs than the ones that got radio play. A good example is Barenaked Ladies’ Stunt, which had big hits with songs like “One Week” and “It’s All Been Done”. My favourites however, were among the other songs, like “In The Car”, or “Told You So”. It wasn’t like I was trying to be unconformist or something, I was just a kid, and besides, how cool would I look if I was bragging about listening to the “good” Barenaked Ladies songs. It’s like boasting about watching the cool Star Trek (this isn’t a shot at BNL, but I’m just trying to say they’re a dorky band).

I think that I feel a certain committment to a band when I buy their album. They wrote 13 songs, not just 3, so I should listen to them all. I can’t justify making a purchase when I am only going to like a small handful of what I’m buying. I guess now with file sharing that problem is easily avoided, but I’ve often felt guilty going through my iTunes and seeing a band with only two or three songs. I even made the decision a few years ago to stop buying any greatest hits compilation or similar CDs, because I think it’s cheating. Am I a real fan of the band’s music, or am I just a casual listener who just wants to hear the “good” songs and then move on.

Now, I’m not saying that listening to singles is a bad thing (though it kind of looks like it in retrospect here) but that I just seem to have a different mindset about music. I feel like I have an obligation to committ fully to it, and I guess I take it more seriously than others. I know plenty of people who don’t really care what they listen to, or just use music as background noise. I find it impossible to do this. I can’t listen to something with indifference, all music invokes some sort of response in me, be it good or negative. Very rarely do I hear something and just go “meh”, and move on (unless it’s a Coldplay song, hahaha….sorry).

I believe that the album may have lost it’s significance a long time ago, the last real time I think it held a lot of prestige was the 1970’s, where you had bands like Led Zeppelin selling millions of albums without having hit singles. During the 80’s, music seemed to become more manufactured, in the way that albums seemed to become groups of songs, and not a cohesive unit. This is where I define what I like about an album. I think that a good, quality album should have all of it’s songs feel like they fit together. They should be similar, but not identical, and flow well in and out of each other. I always ask myself this question, “If you were to rearrange the order of the songs on this album, would it still be as good?”. This is to say, the songs are important in their places, and not just interchangable pieces.

Now we have the iTunes store, where buying just one song is easier than ever, and it seems to be extremely popular. It allows people to get that one song, without buying the whole album. Sure the option is there to buy all of the songs, but more often than not the singles of the day are the most bought items. I guess people don’t have time to sit down and just listen to a record.

So here’s the question, are you an album or a single man (or woman)? Am I just a musical dinosaur living in the past, and the album is a dead format? Am I just a music snob (don’t answer that…) ? Let me know what you prefer to listen to, and why.

- D

Not a Fan #2: Stupid Ad Campaigns

Advertising. The stuff is everywhere, and living in the city, you can’t walk half a block without seeing an ad for something plastered on a bus stand or a telephone pole. We’ve pretty much come to accept being bombarded by advertising all the time, and most people seem to just ignore it and get on with their day. I too, try to ignore as much as I can, but I find it difficult to ignore certains ads that piss me off just by their sheer ridiculousness. Today I’m going to run through some examples of completely stupid ad campaigns, and on a scale of one to ten how much they piss me off.

Culprit #1: Pepsi.

Now, I enjoy Pepsi drinks. I can safely say I prefer Pepsi to Coke, but one of their latest ad campaigns is completely stupid. One day I was walking downtown, when I came face to face with count them FIVE billboards all advertising Pepsi.

Most prominent was a new slogan “Joy It Forward”. What the hell does that even mean? Is it just a cheap corruption of the phrase pay it forward? According to their website, it’s all about spreading joy or some crap. Here’s a quote from the actual site.

I had no idea Pepsi was manufactured with JOY. It must explain why I’m so happy all the time. Also, what the fuck is a “joygle”? If there’s one thing I hate more than simply silly ads, it’s the ads that blatantly make up words and phrases. Say, that’s a perfect segue into my next topic…

Culprit #2: Koodo

God damn Koodo. As soon as I saw the first ads of weirdoes dressed in American Apparel nylons, I knew we were headed to a bad bad place. Little did I know how truly obnoxious the ads for this campaign would get. Every billboard features a freakishly deformed person, and has some sort of invented phrase regarding mobile phone features. Phrases like “bigbillification” or “tabrific” actually piss me off when I read them. It saddens me that I get unhappy at reading a simple billboard, but I find them so annoying I can’t help it. I’m quite fond of the English language, we have a good relationship. It upsets me to see it getting raped like this on countless billboards featuring horribly disfigured people.

Culprit #3: Apple

Alright, this could be kind of up in the air, seeing as a lot of people like this ad campaign. I myself enjoyed the first few commercials. I’m of course referring to the famous “I’m a Mac” commercials with Justin Long and John Hodgman. At first I thought they were slightly funny, cute ads. Then eventually, they just seemed to be slightly dickish, then just basically outright assholish. I mean, I get that most people attack the competition nowadays, but really, Windows isn’t the only operating system out there. Not to mention I’ve never even seen an ad by Microsoft attacking Apple, they just spent their time making bizarre (and strangely hilarious) commercials with Jerry Seinfeld and Bill Gates. It almost seems like Apple has inferiority complex.

What competition?

Culprit #4: Geico

Now, Geico seems to have a problem with deciding on what they want to represent their brand in commercials. First there was the gecko, which I get. Gecko/Geico, similar spelling and name, it’s a pun, plus it was a cute animal, what’s not to love? Then we moved to the weirdly dark caveman commercials, which always made me feel kind of uncomfortable. Those poor bastards just couldn’t catch a break. Now all of a sudden we have another new mascot, and this is the one that just boggles my mind with the sheer amount of stupidity it represents.

This makes sense in somebody's mind

The stack of money, with googly eyes. What. The Fuck. What the hell does any of this have to do with insurance? Alright, you’re saving money, but why the hell does it have eyes? And techno music that seemingly eminates from the googly eyed money pile (as seen in the one commercial where someone removes a glass cover from around the money, and the music gets louder). Who was sitting at a table and suggested this thing? How does something like that get approved by a group of executives? It makes me want to buy insurance from someone else out of spite.

Final Verdict:

Pepsi: Though I find this ad annoying and obnoxious, it isn’t as widespread as some of the others. Still, the creation of stupid terms and phrases irks me so it gets a mild 5/10.

Koodo: God damn, I can’t even think about these without getting pissed off. I just threw my alarm clock across the room after writing that last sentence. This ad sets off all of my irritation alarms, with it’s ugly colours, stupid words, and virus like way it has permeated everywhere I go. 9/10

Apple: I barely see these anymore, but I wanted to bitch about it a little bit anyway. I’ll give it a paltry 4/10, mostly because it just annoys me now, but no real raging occurs.

Geico: The amount of frustration these give me is mostly just due to the absurdity of the stupid money pile. The slogan is still fine, even the music is fine, but that dumb ass pile of googly eyed money is just aggravating in it’s ridiculousness. 7/10

Well there you have it, my thoughts on some ads that I probably shouldn’t care this much about. Check back later for more of me complaining about stuff that most normal people wouldn’t.